Too many times I've met strange females who on the outside seem gentile and kind, true friendship material, new wonderful sisters...until you find out their dark side. At first they're full of compliments, full of praise for anything you do, full of support for whatever you do, and you're full of warm fuzzy feelings of planets aligning and how life makes sense because you've met another person who really understands you and it's not because they just pretend to get you so they can get in your pants (sic). But in the end you find out what they are really full of.
Example from real life: I met this woman from A...nother country. It was like kismet. We met through work, had brief conversations between gigs, quick cups of coffee together and she seemed to be my cup of tea (ah ah ah), we agreed on various things (important when you're starting a friendship, later you can start revealing your true opinions). I was happy, stupid naive me, as I always am when meeting a potential female friend. Then she told me that she was is the process of divorcing her husband, so we had a lot of talks about that. And she was starting a new relationship with another guy, so we had a lot of talks about that. The guy didn't treat her well, so we had a lot of talks about that. Once in a while we brushed on the issues I was going trough, but very quickly got back to her. She often invited me out with her 'new friends' and I often went. I met people through her and sometimes these people would want to see me again. The beautiful thing is she would ALWAYS (people, always! I'm not kidding) say to me 'So, she/he asked for your number, should I give to her/him? But I warn you, this person is a bit crazy, talks too much, calls me all the time, really annoying, seems like a nice person, but ooohh boy, when you really get to know him/her...' Did I emphasise enough that she aaahhhlllways did this? I thought it was strange, but I was so happy of my new friend that I let it go. For too long.
I could write a book about this woman. But that would give her too much attention and that's exactly what she wants. Even if she never read that book, somehow she would know that her wonderfulness had been documented somewhere (this post obviously doesn't count). So I'll give you the cliff notes of our wonderful "friendship": About 98% of the info she told me about her life was false. She complained about every person she/we knew. She complained about me to other people. Told lies about other people to me. Told lies about me to other people. She bitched about her boyfriend excessively (to the point that he abused her and was a psychopath) but didn't ever finish the relationship. And in the end she made me feel that I had ruined our friendship, but never really specified what I had done to her.
What creates these types of women? Why make friendships if you wanna screw people over? Where's the satisfaction? I have too many questions and only stupid fragments of answers. Is it really just jealousy that ruins the affection between women?
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| this calls for a caption contest photo from here |
To balance things a bit, I do have sweet, supportive female friends. All four of them. I trust them not to put a knife on my back. To listen patiently to my long winding stories that I don't always tell very coherently. To whom I can actually make a 4 AM phone call. They tolerate even if I don't call them for awhile because I'm 'busy'. Then one day I pick up the phone or send mail and we feel like no time has passed from the last time we spoke.
Then there are the men. But that's another bible altogether.
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